thinking...

songs for today...


sort of quarrel today...
but kinda ok after awhile..
BUT..
when i reached home i felt something was wrong... why do WE kept ended up in an argument or quarrel? we kept telling each other "lets not argue""lets not quarrel alright?" but still we ended up in the same situation again and again... my friends may think "ah yah awhile jiu ok already lahs"

it takes two hand to clap...
YES! apple tried to change after i told him wats wrong and the few days were really nice and we really did not quarrel but a few days ltr same old routine will be going on and on..
i just dunno why .. i cant even describe it out.. sometimes he said something which he think its a joke and even after i told him to stop saying he still continued and somethings he said really do hurts me..

you told me tat if you did say anything or do anything i dislike just tell you on the spot... when i start telling you.. you always start to stop me from talking... alright i stopped thn you start to say things to agitate me.. and when I'm alright you'll start ur moodiness.. and this kept continue again till a time when we both give in...

sometimes i really feel like giving up but i dun think is worth it because of such matters.. when i cant take it I'll cry til i feel really better tats why whenever you pull me when i cried i will sort of push you away i was trying to calm myself down..
sometimes i wonder is it my fault? am i too sensitive bout wat you say and start getting pissed off.. but in times no matter how many tyms i told you stop saying you still continued saying...

i really tried saving this relationship when things goes wrong.. you said you wont leave me but scared I'll leave you.. have you tot of when you have nth did i ever tot of leaving you? i did nt because you're my bf i share your sorrows and happiness too i stay by ur side because i wan you to know you still have me who is caring for you worrying for you and loving you no matter wat happens to you... is this nt enough to prove tat i truly wants to be wit you?

i really wants you to have your own decision and nt always "up to you lor" sometimes things i can decide on my own i will decide but when i cant can you decide or think rather thn kept telling me "ah yah i donno lahs don't ask me"or"anything lor".. if i keep thinking one day i really will break down.. i really feel stress for my studies.. i have to think of you, family,studies.. you may think for wat go and think this kinda things.. my dad mom and sis do put very high hopes on me at the same tym my family keep quarreling.. i really do wish you could decide things for me when i need you to decide...

tats all i have to say... I'm not trying to say we should nt be tgt its just tat things problem has been wit us for a very long time... i really wans you to understand and hope this problem can be solve...
tats all.. TTFN tata for now...

A picture took after school..